The Monster and the Flea

This week is software release week.
Our day-job software product is a direct competitor to a particular Microsoft product, but we are small fry in comparison to the mighty Gates Godzilla. So small, in fact, that we are merely a flea on the back of a rat on the back of the monster which is called Microsoft. But it’s a start.

There is a great deal riding on this software version, not least the ability to eat and pay the mortgage. It has been a tremendously stressful few years. My dearest partner has sweated 70+ hour weeks for over two-and-a-half-years to turn our company around. We have stressed, we have argued, we have come mighty close to losing everything.

Now it’s over.

Now all we can do is wait, and hope that potential customers will like our software enough to ditch the truly crappy Microsoft code and spend shiny hard CASH on this little flea.

Here is a little ditty that I wrote twelve years ago when we first started the company. It still seems apt! (although you will please note that I am definitely no poet)

An Ode to Mr Bill Gates

One day a famous man called Gates
Came knocking at my door.
“I wanna buy your company”, he said,
“I’d like a guided tour”.

I took him to my office,
He played with my groovy code.
“Richard, you’re a genius”, he said,
“This will surely cost a load.”

I took him to the kitchen.
He scoffed up all the food,
“And now let’s do a deal”, he said,
“I’m in a dealing mood.

“I must admit your product,
Has cost me an arm and leg.
How much do I have to pay today,
Or do I have to beg ?”

He offered me £50,000 UK pounds.
I turned down his offer flat.
“I see I’ve underestimated you”, he said,
“I am a silly prat !

“I’ll bring my millions tomorrow,
Just six or eight or ten”,
But then – oh bugger- I woke up,
And I was poor again.

Lilmummy, looking gorgeous in an eye-watering pose which would surely make me end-up in hospital (again).