The Wife-Without-Camera

Because Richard does on average between sixty and seventy hours work every week, this generally means that I am the one who organises shoots, corresponds with models, sorts out travelling arrangement, fees (if any) and so forth. Actually, I really do enjoy this part of the photographic process. Chatting to other models is fun! Plus there is the added advantage that if I am the one who organises the bookings, because I am a woman and fellow model, this generally serves to reassure potential models that Rich is not some axe-murdering lunatic, nor that he is some perv who is solely interested in the cheap (or more usually, rather expensive) thrill of being alone with a naked woman.

I guess I see my role as a sort of photographic airline-stewardess in the background, dispensing occasional beverages, sandwiches and rather tasty home-made cake (I do good cake!), whilst being hopefully useful as an assistant if I’m needed. I’m not around for the actual shooting process for nude shoots (I’m sorry folks but it really is the most boring thing in the world to watch), so I tend to only be around for any fashion or wedding shoots, where I am needed to reposition clothes/hair and so forth.

Richard never hides the fact that Fluffytek is a partnership – we do this together. He is openly proud that we are a team, and insists I am around to say hello, drink tea and chat before the shoot. He says this helps put the model (and chaperone, if present) at ease, plus it makes the whole photographic process more fun!

The whole “shoot procedure” has become a well-oiled ritual nowadays, and models (and clients) have seemed to like this process and enjoyed/appreciated my occasional presence and low-profile assistance (and cake). At least I thought they did.

However, more recently there have been rumblings in the machine, and I no longer feel as certain about my role as I once did. Whereas it seems to be perfectly acceptable, reassuring and professional to have an assistant present during a shoot, this apparently does not extend to where the assistant is the photographer’s wife.

Whereas 95% of models are perfectly comfortable with wives being around, and suitably reassured for their own safety, some potential models seem to regard this as creepy, even somewhat “dodgy”. After talking to a couple of other photographers’ wives in similar situations (i.e. they are assistants and business partners), it seems that wives are increasingly being seen as “checking up” on the husband, making sure he doesn’t do anything untoward. Wives are (usually wrongly) being perceived as interfering jealous spouses, and it appears that some models feel awkward and nervous with the wife around, even if she’s in a completely separate building next door! Simply knowing the wives are there is enough to creep them out!

To some extent I can understand this. There have been several instances on MM and the UK web-models forums that describe a wife coming home in the middle of a shoot and throwing a jealous hippy fit. I have also heard some horrible stories on some model blogs which describe where the wife is clearly bisexual and is as much a WWC (Wife without camera) as her GWC husband (basically where husband and wife get their sexual kicks out of being in the same room as a nekkid chick). Of course these stories are really horrible and mercifully they don’t happen very often, but unfortunately these stories are giving the whole “wife as assistant” concept a really bad name. The minority are ruining it for the majority. A case of a few rare scare stories really spreading like wildfire and resulting in some models being apprehensive about booking photographers if their wives are around.

This means that some models actually prefer shoots where the wife doesn’t know about the husband’s photography, or at least if they do, that the wife isn't on the premises at the time of the shoot. We have experienced this rarely, but it has happened. It’s a kind of “pro-guy-with-camera” preference, a sort of bizarre twist of logic. GWC’s with secret agendas (who don’t tell their wives) actually make some models more comfortable than having to cope with possible internal psychological dynamics between H+W.

But, heck, this is supposed to be a semi-pro photography business! Assistants are supposed to be present. Why discriminate against the assistant where she is a wife? Should Richard now only introduce me as an assistant rather than his wife, and should I now leave my wedding ring at home? Should I stay clear altogether, and just go out when he has a shoot?

Sometimes I feel like a creep by association.

Let me state this plainly: I do not have a hidden agenda, I do not get cheap thrills from Rich shooting with models, plus I trust my partner! I enjoy a cuppa, a chat, feeling part of the photographic process. I love the whole process of making art. There’s no jealousy here folks! I’m a nude model too you know!

I’ve been in my day-job business with my husband for nearly fifteen years now, and I can honestly say we work pretty well together as a team. We are certainly well experienced at separating business from pleasure, and we are both trained professionals. O.K. I am a wife, yes, but I can’t help that. I see this as an asset which helps enhance the process of making art, rather than a liability which ruins it.

How can a wife be seen as a professional, rather than a jealous spouse?




Syd and A.J. from a shoot earlier this week. This was a really fun shoot with a gorgeous and talented husband and wife team. They were really good models! Both Rich and I love this image! Such chemistry! Rich says this is the shoot he’s most enjoyed so far this year. Thanks guys! More please!